I’ve been discussing since last week – abusive relationships. And today, I will share why people stay in abusive relationships. Among the previous posts I’ve written on this topic (which is a series) Includes How to know an abusive relationship and effects of staying in abusive relationships.
I have written extensively on both posts on the topic of abusive relationships, from its definition to deciphering what it really is. This would help us go straight to the point as to why people remain in abusive relationships and then subsequently, I will share with you how to get out of such relationship.
Why do people stay in abusive relationships?
The reasons why people stay in abusive relationships include but not limited to the following.
1. They have low self esteem
A lot of people stay in relationships that are abusive because of low self esteem. A person with low self-esteem feels unworthy, incapable, and incompetent. In fact, because the person with low self-esteem feels so poorly about him or herself, these feelings may actually cause the person’s continued low self-esteem. Your self esteem is how you value yourself, what you think of yourself or how you see your self. When people think low or too low of themselves, they tend to take just whatever comes their way as deserving. They don’t question their situations on status quo.
When you start to believe you cannot get someone better, or your current boy/girlfriend or even spouse can be and is the best you can get, then you might be suffering from low self esteem. You deserve the best and nothing less and anything other than the best is not good enough for you.
2. Don’t know that they are in one
You might remain in a relationship where you are being abused, but because of the level of pretense of the abuser or his “cun” or whatever reason, you don’t know you are being abused until it escalates to something else.
You have to be smart and take into consideration anything that repeats itself spontaneously.
3. They don’t speak out
Some people are being abused in silence. They claim they love their abuser so much to the point they wouldn’t speak or expose them at all so as not to dent their image. Excuse me, if you are doing this, then you are already in a hole and still digging. You have to do all you can to come out of it and if voicing out will do, then waste no time, speak to people who can help you and get out of that crap union with immediate effect
4. The fear of being alone
There is nothing as annoying to me as hearing people say they cannot be alone. What the hell is that?!!! You were created alone for crying out loud. There is no crime in being alone, it remains a sin if you are with the wrong person. You really have to understand that you first have to be alone to get the perfect one(or at least, near perfect partner) is there even any harm in being alone? Perhaps you might want to share with us via the comment area below if you think there is, or if there is not, your reasons.
Greed is good, yes, you heard me right, greed is good. And greed is one reason people remain in abusive relationships. However their greed is the negative greed, for selfish interests. I wrote about how greed helps in building wealth here, you might want to read that up.
If you want to remain in an abusive relationship for the financial gain, you might want to count the costs, and make a choice – to leave or to stay.
Last on my list on why people remain in abusive relationships is LUST. So many people remain in abusive relationships because of lust – He is extremely handsome or she is strikingly beautiful. Can you please lust after someone else and save your life?(alright, I was joking), but that is not totally a joke because you just have to leave to make way for someone else, and it’s high time you got serious and start loving and not just “LUSTING”.
I hope you find the reason to leave whatever abusive relationship you find yourself. The dangers are very grave and I wouldn’t want you to continue in it.
What are the reasons you think people remain in abusive relationships? Is the list comprehensive enough? If you made this list, what will you add and which of these will you not include? We want to hear you speak, use the comment area below to share your thoughts with us, Over to you
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