How to leave an abusive relationship is the last of the four topics I’ve touched on abusive relationships, and I’ve made Leaving an abusive relationship the last because after learning everything on abusive relationships, leaving is the last thing one must do.
A lot of people who are in one are looking for ways to get out, the major reason they are “looking for a way” is because it’s easier said than done, in other words, it is not as easy as it sounds to leave any relationship, abusive relationships too.
Why isn’t leaving abusive relationships simple?
The major reason leaving an abusive relationship is difficult is because most often than not, the abused person in a relationship (the Victim)usually always invest so much into the relationship and it’s so sad and heartbreaking to see your investment of time, effort, emotion and maybe money, go down the drain just because someone is “stupid enough” to take you for a ride and you are walking away, and worse so, the other party might not be running at any loss. Because most times, these people put in so much just to make it work, it’s sad and very difficult for them to decide to let go. They are the ones who show more love in the relationship and are willing to give whatever it’ll take to remain in it. But then, at the end of this post, you’ll have little tips to make the move that has always been inevitable possible.
How to leave an abusive relationship?
The following are simple (but quite effort demanding) steps in leaving that relationship that is all but good. I’m not going to pretend it’ll be easy, unless I’ve never loved would I say that, (and I’m currently experiencing the most amazing love life, so I know what it means to leave one you love and wanted things to work out with). So brace up and follow the following steps and see it work.
• Step 1: Decide to leave
Once to realize you are being abused, please decide to leave, this will make it possible. The first step in leaving is decision. Once you decide, other things will start falling in place.
• Step 2: Stop caring
Another step is for you to stop to care. I understand you are probably putting all your best efforts, trying to satisfy your partner, but it has all but worked. The reason you can’t let go is because you still care. Once you stop to care, you’ll start to be detached from him/her. And that is progress in the right direction.
• Step 3: Realize the adverse effect of staying
You know there are negative effects of staying back, but the “blindness” love has casted on you has refused you from seeing it, once you “receive your sight” and realize staying does more harm than good, then your leaving becomes even easier because there is now a reason and purpose to chase.
• Step 4:Become Stubborn
Your emotion will want to play you. It might start having a pity feeling for your lover, don’t listen to your emotion. This time, use your Brain. Apply conscious effort to tell your emotion “now it’s finished”. You only want out. And with time, you’ll get over it.
• Step 5:Don’t listen
This time, your lover will have started seeing changes in you. He/she might start to sense your nonchalance and might start making efforts to restore the relationship to what it used to be(the beautiful days). Unless you are prepared to go over the entire abuse episode again should you give in. Otherwise don’t listen. Don’t be deceived. The longer you stay, the more difficult your leaving will be. The deeper the scar will be in your heart. Don’t listen. He/she might become “sweeter” than ever, don’t be deceived. Once an abuser, always an abuser. The end point of it all is that he/she will devise a more subtle means of abusing you, you might never recover. It becomes useless after writing all these on how to leave an abusive relationship, and you make a mess of it by listening to his sugar coated tongue.
• Step 6: Leave
This time, you’ve got to leave. You have tried to detach from him/her emotionally, you have come this far. You can now walk away. The effect will be mild since you’ve applied certain steps (from 1-6).
You can now open up and be prepared for someone who will appreciate you better. Should your abuser of a partner return pleading for a return, would you want to return? Don’t worry, stick around I will write on that next.
Over to you, what do you think about these steps? Are these tips on how to leave an abusive relationship feasible? Do you think they can work in your situation? What would you have included that is missing? Share whatever your ideas are with us using the comment area below.
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